18 tips on how to drive a man crazy in bed

If the thought of driving a man crazy in bed has never crossed your mind, throw the first stone.

I have thought about this, you must already have, and our friends certainly have done it too.

Driving a man wild in bed is quite a unique feeling, one of the most delicious sensations that us women can feel. And I dare to say, I don’t know who gets more out of it – the man or you.

There are no secrets, but there are some things that us women tend to overlook sometimes.

Men have their own way of getting turned on as they have a different perception of what they value in bed.

I will explain it all in 18 tips which you can use whenever and wherever you want.

Of course you don’t have to, and you wouldn’t even be able to use them all at once, but do it in parts, get a tip for one night, another tip for another night, or if you want of course, enjoy more than one tip on the same night.

After all, seeing him aroused also makes us aroused, right?

In order for you to make a man super horny during sex you first need to love yourself and be very confident of yourself.

In addition to feeling beautiful and sexy, you need to pass this on to your partner. 

He needs to realize that you are a self-assured woman, that you know what you want and that you have a healthy relationship with your own sexuality.

Don’t forget: you are responsible for your sexuality and your desires. 

Based on that:

1) Take care of yourself in every way

Always take care of yourself physically and emotionally. Keep yourself shaved, neat, freshened up, at ease with yourself, loving yourself, worrying about your self-care.

Men like women who take care of themselves, especially if they know that you do it primarily for yourself, but also for them.

Let him know that you dress up for yourself and also for him too.

2) Love yourself

Love your body and your personality. Be and feel sexy and attractive.

Overflow sensuality and self-confidence. Maintain a positive attitude and lead life in a fun and enjoyable way.

You need to love yourself as you are, without worrying about “false” beauty standards. 

If you are not satisfied with yourself, then take care of yourself and improve your self-esteem.

Know that the cellulite and stretch marks that might bother you are not even noticed by men. And that all of us “mortals” have cellulite.

There is a big difference between women who are ashamed of their bodies and those who do not care about it, therefore worrying a lot less about these details during sex.

When the moment comes, the best is to surrender entirely without any worries. 

Men are not worried if you have cellulite here or there, they want to grab you, feel you, so give yourself to it. A man doesn’t see what you are worried about.

3) Take initiative

Show yourself as a sexually active being, surprise your man, demonstrate your sensuality without fear, ask him to do what you like, don’t hide your sexuality.

A woman with a self-confident attitude is very attractive. This does not prevent him from taking control of the relationship at other times and enjoying it in the same way.

Move around, don’t be passive by letting him do everything himself. Men also like sexually active women.

4) Masturbate

Masturbate alone for in order to develop your autoeroticism and self-knowledge.  

Women who know themselves well know how to position themselves better during sex and even know how to instruct their partner about their sexual preferences and desires. This will show him your sexual confidence and autonomy.

Masturbate so he can see you. This view is extremely exciting for men. Show him how you like to touch yourself and I guarantee you will see the effects of that.  

5) Surrender to the moment

Be present during sex, thoroughly enjoying what you are doing whether you are receiving or giving pleasure. And show him how much you enjoy it.

A man notices when a woman is having a good time or just doing it “for the sake of it”. 

You can speak and demonstrate how you feel through moans, whispers, or dirty talk.

6) Show how much you desire him

Make your man feel desired, attractive and admired.

Look at him and tell him how much he turns you on, how much pleasure he gives you.

Praise your man, “adore” his penis, with sincerity of course, or he will know right away that you are playing a role.

Do not worry so much about the technicalities of oral sex. A soft, warm and moist mouth already gives men intense pleasure.

Do not worry about the technique, surrender yourself to the pleasure of what you are doing.

7) Eroticize your life

Create moments and situations where you can think about sex.

Read, watch erotic movies. Eroticize your life, fantasize a lot. It will make you more sensual and it will bring you more desire. 

Anyone who watches, reads, or thinks about sex outside of the bedroom, is often more active and sexual in bed. Sex starts with the thoughts that we have during the day.

Read also: The 8 biggest fetishes for men and women

8) Start sex before you get to the bedroom

Eroticize your life

Sex doesn’t just start in bed.

During the day you can encourage your partner to think about you and to look forward to the moment of you two getting together.

You can send him suggestive, spicy messages or tease him over the phone, hinting how much pleasure you will both have later.

You can send him pictures of small parts of your body, of new lingerie that you will wear for him or of a new erotic toy that you will try together.

If you start doing this during the day, he will be thinking about you until night comes. When you get to the bedroom, his desire will already be at its peak.

9) Innovate

Invent new things, propose new ideas, use your creativity and do not hesitate to let your imagination run wild.

Suggest sexual games and escape your routine. Sex that is always done the same way, in the same environment, wearing the same lingerie will hardly provoke men.

If you want to really turn him on, make sure to do things differently every now and then.

10) Have the best oral sex of your life

Men love oral sex, but you need to do it willingly and with desire.

Give yourself entirely to the practice. Look at him from time to time, eye to eye, to see his expression of pleasure, tell him how much you like to suck him, how much you like his taste.

Suck his penis enthusiastically being careful not to hurt it with your teeth.

Suck him, lick him, caress him, suck his testicles if he likes it, suck the penis glans, the perineum (region between the testicles and the anus).

If he is up for it, you can caress him, kiss him and also stimulate him in the anal region. Many men tend to like this caress.

While you suck his entire penis, you can use your hands and masturbate it at the same time. 

And again, if he likes it, you can penetrate your finger into his anus while sucking him, massaging his prostate.

He will be delirious with pleasure. Do you like to swallow sperm? So do it. You will see how much pleasure he will feel. But if you don’t like it, don’t even try it, as it can be bad for you.

Read also: How to give a man the best oral sex of his life: 21 tips on the ultimate blowjob

11) Make sex fun and enjoyable

Do not get caught up in judgment or fear.

Make sex lighter, joyful and even add some sex games. 

Do not be over demanding of yourself and do not worry about your performance. Just give yourself entirely. 

Forget the orgasm for a while and enjoy every moment. The orgasm will be a consequence.

12) Do not be short on kisses and caresses

Be generous about kisses, bites, sucks, licks, and caresses all over the body.

Show him that there are many more parts of the body that are receptive to erotic touch. Discover these new areas that are often still unknown together.

You know that part of his body that you haven’t bitten, sucked, or licked yet? Go there with your tongue, your mouth, or your hands. Go exactly where you’ve never been!

13) Explore the whole house and other places

Do not limit yourself to the comfort of the bed. Explore other places such as other rooms, other sofas, other rugs… and also the shower, the pool, the garden, the garage, the stairs, the car… etc.

Dare to try different places and new sexual positions for each new place.

14) Do a striptease for him

Confirming all of your confidence, choose a sexy song and do a sexy striptease dance.

Tease him without letting him touch you. Get closer, get away, leaving him with a lot of desire for you.

Take off your clothes sensually, always looking him in the eye and feeling like the sexiest woman in the world.

Be bold. Tease him. Men are very visual; they will love the show.

15) Anal sex

If you both like it, get ready for anal sex and take the initiative, always demonstrating the pleasure you feel through moans and whispered words in his ears.

16) Explore different sexual positions

Always vary your sexual positions, find the ones that appeal to you the most.

Enjoy the ones where you can touch your clitoris, this will help you feel even more aroused.

Men are visual and new sexual positions will allow them to see your body from various angles. Men love different positions.

17) Share your sexual fantasies

Exchange information about sexual fantasies. When you become more intimate, talking about your fantasies while having sex is very exciting.

You can transport yourself to the imagined scene, giving details of everything you are imagining.

Even when not having sex, talk to him about your fantasies, your desires, and say that you would love to live this fantasy with him.

This usually makes men very aroused, knowing that they have been chosen for this experience.

18) Give an erotic massage

If you are not sure on how to start an erotic massage, you can search for information and videos that will help you. 

What I can tell you is: use a good massage oil and touch your partner’s sensually, using your body and not just your hands.

Use your breasts, butt, arms, and hair to stimulate different areas of his body. Be sensual, look your partner in the eyes, whisper, breathe on his skin, seduce him.

And to top it off finish by giving him a delicious Lingam massage (massage on the penis).

This type of massage is different from masturbation as it has no intention of leading to an orgasm, but instead there is an intention to caress the penis.

Orgasms can happen, but they will not be the end goal. You can use a silicone-based lubricant or any type of oil that can be used on the genitals.

Make slow movements around his penis, testicles and perineum. You can caress the penis by alternating your hands in bottom-up movements for a few times and then do the opposite movement, from top to bottom also alternating your hands.

Then, with one hand you touch the penis in an upward and downward motion and with the palm of the other hand you will touch the glans in a circular motion.

Your partner will feel a different yet pleasurable sensation. You will definitely surprise him.

To conclude

To conclude, I must emphasize the importance of surrendering yourself to the moment without worrying.

Be yourself, be daring, have fun, feel pleasure in what you do and enjoy the pleasure that you receive.

Demonstrate lust and desire for your partner. Loosen up, innovate, feel attractive, sexy and confident about yourself.

Feeling like this you will convey a lot of sensuality and lust. And you will enjoy wonderful sex.

Patrícia Correia Arouca Psicóloga Especialista em Sexualidade Humana
Patrícia Correia Arouca

Psychologist, Sexologist, Post graduate in Sexual Therapy by the Sexology Center of Brasília (CESEX), a member of the World Association for Sexology and FLASSES – Federación Latinoamericana de Sociedades de Soxologia y Educación Sexual.


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