There are certain things you can talk about during sex to further arouse those who are with you.
To find out once and for all how to unlock this secret power in bed, we’ve called in some experts on sexy talk.
So join us as we dive into what dirty talk is, how to use it and everything you should say in bed to get your partner aroused.
Read also:
- The 5 best erotic movies for you to watch alone or together
- The 8 biggest fetishes for men and women
What is Dirty Talk?
We must first define what dirty talk is.
One of the most exciting ways to express yourself in an erotic context, dirty talk consists of using the most explicit words in order to stimulate sexual arousal.
It can be used before or during sex. The idea is to break barriers and say everything that can make whoever is in bed with you as horny as possible.
Making vivid descriptions, using sexual humor, dictating commands and even using profanity can all be worth it.
20 example sentences for great dirty talk
Want to know what to say in bed or during foreplay?
Here are 20 excellent examples of dirty talk phrases. They were selected amongst the most hottest phrases, with the help of many experts on the subject.
Check them out:
- “I’m so horny now”
- “It makes me crazy just to see you!”
- “I wanna f*ck you real hard!”
- “Tonight you are mine”
- “You drive me insane!”
- “I’ll make you go crazy!”
- “F*ck me hard!”
- “I wish your c**k was getting sliding in me now”
- “Your boobs are delicious”
- “Pull my hair”
- “Slap my butt”
- “Am I your slutty girl?”
- “Cum for me”
- “I love your taste”
- “I love to watch you cum”
- “You make my p*ssy wet”
- “This is so good!”
- “Hold me tight”
- “Come on, I can’t wait any longer!”
- “I can’t take it anymore”
There is no right or wrong
“There is no right or wrong way to talk during sex. The only thing that matters is what turns you and whoever you are with on”, stresses the sex therapist and psychologist Marlon Mattedi.
We will be giving examples of what to say here, but make sure to use expressions that best suit you, according to your feeling at the time. Use what arouses you the most.
Adjust your expressions to what feels good to you. Adjust to what turns you on.
What we know is that, in general, “low key” expressions tend to be much more arousing than out in the open, “high key” expressions.
For example, think about it. What would turn you on the most?
“My Olympian goddess, tonight we will make love”, or “Tonight you are all mine”?
“When the sun rises I will still be in your arms”, or “Today I wanna be yours…”?
Poetry can be divine, but sex is about movement, fantasies, touching… it is more of a carnal pleasure.
Why is dirty talk so arousing?
A lot of people may stop and think: how can saying dirty or naughty things turn someone on? A lot has to do with the stimulation caused by our imagination.
Dirty talk anticipates something that will be done later and leaves those who like it craving for more.
Another factor besides anticipation that makes dirty talk so interesting is how it can act as a thermometer of how things are going.
Speaking of sex, everyone may know how much you’re enjoying it.
A lot more people than you think are stimulated by this erotic way of speaking.
According to a survey published by Marie Claire magazine, 43% of women and 38% of men like to listen to the other person talking dirty to them.
Read also: 10 things you didn’t know men liked in bed
The opposite is also true! According to an international survey published by the website Big Think, 1 in 5 people have already stopped having sex because of discouraging words in bed.
But who are these dirty talk experts after all?
Flavianahot is a cam girl and knows a lot about dirty talk.
Now that you know what dirty talk is, why it is so arousing and the 20 best phrases during sex, what better way to help you understand how to use these magic words than to invite some experts on the subject?
These specialists even helped pick the most arousing phrases.
Imagine a profession in which what you most need to do is make another person aroused at a distance, especially with what you say and what you show.
This profession exists and is called being a “cam girl” (or “cam boy”). And it is precisely because these individuals dedicate themselves to turning people on from a distance that they are considered experts on the subject.
They talk to users through webcam chats and need to keep things super hot.
Dirty talk is one of their greatest weapons. That is why we brought cam girls Nina Dias, Flaviana Hot and Hope from CameraHot, a live sex website, to teach us a little more about the topic.
How to start using dirty talk
Many may end up not knowing how to start talking, as strange as it sounds.
Starting to talk about everything in bed can be a little scary and quite difficult for someone who has never done it before.
So starting with dirty talk through sexting (i.e., through hotter, sexier messages) might be a good option for introverts. A call can also be a good starter.
“I believe that sexting is a great initiative for those who are shy. Spicier conversations, a hint on WhatsApp and some provocative nudes during the day can create expectations and things will start to heat up, relieving tension and helping reduce shyness”, explains cam girl Hope.
Hope is a cam girl and uses a lot of dirty talk.
Beginners in this practice can also practice speaking erotic phrases while nobody is around so they can get used to doing it.
Flaviana Hot’s tip involves literature, which is also a good way to start with dirty talk: “reading erotic stories also helps and, above all, getting to know your partner well is super important”.
“Good dialogue between you two is important”, she concludes.
How to avoid shyness around talking dirty
One of the biggest challenges for those who have never used dirty talk and want to get started is shyness.
Many are afraid of saying the wrong thing and offending their sex partner, others think they might sound ridiculous.
The best tip is to leave self-criticism out of the bedroom. Don’t try to be a saint in bed.
You won’t know how you’re doing if you never try it. Most of the time, your partner will enjoy hearing the naughty things you’ll say.
Nina Dias is a cam girl and uses dirty talk.
Cam girl Nina Dias also has a very interesting piece of advice: “keep some pre-programmed words in mind and, if necessary, close your eyes to avoid feeling ashamed”.
What do people like to hear during sex?
It depends. There are all kinds of tastes and the possibilities in dirty talk are endless.
Many people like to hear compliments, many people like to hear how horny their partner is, and there are many people who prefer name-calling and swearing.
Requests and descriptions such as “slap my butt” or “give me everything you’ve got” are also very welcome, and we know this from CameraHot’s experiences.
In the end, it’s a matter of trial and error.
Getting to know who’s in bed with you a little better helps you understand what she or he will enjoy hearing during sex.
The more spontaneous the better!
There’s no use in forcing it either. The best way to use dirty talk is to talk in an exciting way about what you feel or want.
The problem is that anyone who doesn’t do it spontaneously runs the risk of sounding fake.
“I really like dirty talk because it’s a provocative way to know how sex is going, what you’ve done well or how out of control you’re getting, but for those who consider trying it, nothing should be forced or too rude, as it can break the mood,” explains Hope.
The limits of dirty talk
What is said or heard does not always have an arousing tone.
As we mentioned before, each person has a different style and what works for one might not work for the other.
So it’s important to be careful at the beginning and go for a more flattering approach at first.
What may seem arousing to a certain person can be highly disrespectful to someone else.
The idea is to always provoke and, in no way, offend. Be careful about terms like “bitch” and “slut”, for example.
Some women like to be called that during sex, but others will hate it, so getting to know your partner well, listening to what she says during sex and how she feels, is essential to avoid making mistakes.
The same applies to men. In general, intensifiers are welcome, for example: “you’re so big” or “you’re so hard”.
These are expressions that excite a large part of them, but every man is different.
Keep experimenting.
What not to say at all
But offenses are not always the only thing that gets in the way of dirty talk.
There are words and terms that are simply blunt, as our experts at CameraHot explain.
“Coochie! Never call it [the vagina] coochie”, says Nina Dias. “Avoid giving nicknames to his penis too. When in doubt, simply refer to it as “dick” or “cock”.
“I think it’s super tacky when the man keeps asking the woman to orgasm. It’s a lot of pressure.
Orgasms are a consequence and will come when a woman is at her peak”, explains Flaviana Hot. “Comparisons to another woman are also without a doubt very bad”.
For Hope, using diminutives is what reduces the arousal: “During sex I don’t find it very exciting when men say things in diminutive.
For me love is love, sex is sex. ‘My little love’, ‘my little princess’ can be used at another time and place”.
Sources:
- Gender and sexual orientation in relation to hypothalamic structures
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/1292983/ - An examination of predictors of nonverbal and verbal communication of pleasure during sex and sexual satisfaction
https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0265407512454523 - Pillow Talk: Examining respondents’ sexual talk in and out of the bedroom
https://onlinedoctor.superdrug.com/pillow-talk/
