The Complete Guide to Female and Male Masturbation

Summary

1 – What is masturbation?
2 – 8 tips for you
3 – How a woman masturbates
4 – How a man masturbates
5 – The difference between a man and a woman (when masturbating)
6 – How to give a man a good hand-job?
7 – How to give a woman a good hand-job?

What is Masturbation?

Masturbation is the act of stimulating the genitals with the intention of generating pleasure.

It is the act of placing the hand or some other object on the genitals and creating movement in order to provoke sexual arousal.

Touching, hitting, rubbing, squeezing, moving from top to bottom, from bottom to top, are just some of the ways to provoke stimulus on the penis or on the vulva (female genital organ).

The act of masturbating is practiced by men and women.

It usually appears more intensely during puberty/adolescence but can remain a constant practice all throughout life.

It is the intention of touching the male or female genitals in the search for pleasure.

It may or may not be associated with an orgasm, that is, one may or may not climax as a result.

Masturbation has existed since the beginning of mankind. It is a natural and absolutely healthy practice which has been condemned and prohibited in some periods and by some cultures, so we are afraid to masturbate sometimes.

But any adult human being at some point in life has already masturbated or wanted to go through these moments of genital stimulation that we call masturbation.

8 Tips for you on how to masturbate

If you want to masturbate or if you already have this habit, take advantage of these tips and put them into practice.

You will certainly enjoy greater pleasure.

1) Do not view the genitals (for example, the glans and the clitoris) as the center point

The entire genital is able to be stimulated.

If you focus only on the glans of the penis or the clitoris, you will miss out on the other parts that have a lot of pleasure to give as well.

Both men and women can take the opportunity to stimulate their entire organ.

The ideal is to go far beyond one single point of sensitivity in the genital organ.

2) Avoid speeding up your masturbation movements early

Start slowly and create stimulation by touching the genitals. Let the excitement gradually build up.

This is a pleasant and healthy way for the body to be aroused.

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3) If the vagina is not lubricated or the penis is not hard, don’t worry – start stimulating it and it soon will be

Neither men nor women are ready for pleasure without giving sexual stimuli.

It is necessary to start the stimulus first so that arousal will come and consequently trigger the erection in the penis or the lubrication in the vagina.

Initiate physical stimuli and take the opportunity to think about pleasant, delicious, arousing moments.

4) Be sure to always fantasize about something in your head, it won’t happen without fantasizing

During masturbation, it is not only the stimuli that are given to the body which are important; it is necessary to feed the stimuli given to the mind.

Arousal is not only due to physical stimuli – you need the other part, which is psychological.

Combine the two and your pleasure will be even greater.

Stimuli can be images, memories, souvenirs or creations of yours that represent pleasant and enjoyable moments, something that you have lived or that you think about living one day, for example.

5) Avoid watching movies every time you masturbate, after a while you will find it difficult to fantasize without them

Associating sex movies to masturbation is more common for men than for women.

Men usually masturbate while watching porn, this is not a problem.

But the act of always masturbating with porn can have some undesirable consequences.

I encourage you to imagine the scenes, rather than finding them ready through a TV, cell phone, tablet, and so on.

Those who use porn to get aroused can after a while no longer get aroused without the help of these films, accelerating the moment of orgasm and making it hard to get turned on by their own fantasies.

Try to prioritize scenes in your head and not the images coming from the screen so much.

6) Look for a place where you will not be interrupted

If you are in a place where someone can interrupt you, it is common for you to want to speed it up so you can reach an orgasm soon.

If this happens, as time goes by, you will stop fully enjoying the moment of pleasure between the beginning and the end of masturbation, and this period will be shortened.

The ideal is to have as much time as you want so you can masturbate peacefully.

7) Very hot or very cold temperatures and places hinder the increase of sexual arousal

Find a nice place to masturbate even in terms of temperature.

If it is too hot or too cold, your body will certainly not be aroused in the same way.

You are unlikely to enjoy what you are experiencing if you are feeling too cold or too hot.

8) Avoid masturbating right after a meal

When we are digesting, our organism is not open to arousal.

This is how nature works – if you need to process food, then this is not the time for sexual activity.

Let an hour go by as you digest and, after that, if you wish, go enjoy your moment of pleasure.

Read also:

How a woman masturbates

1) Some women feel guilty about masturbating

Some women tend to find it strange to masturbate, as if masturbation were not something completely natural.

For some women, the greatest difficulty when it comes to masturbating is not physical.

The biggest limitation for a woman to allow herself to masturbate is inside her own head.

Change your thoughts, allow yourself to feel pleasure and to think about sex, and the benefits will appear.

Your teacher, your neighbor, your boss, your cousin… they all masturbate, there’s nothing wrong with that.

On the contrary, there are several benefits to this practice.

Start finding the benefits of masturbating, which are infinitely greater than not masturbating.

If you already want to masturbate, it is natural for the body to begin to open up, to allow itself, and to be touched over time.

2) Women don’t always need to take all their clothes off

When you masturbate, try to take only part of your clothes off, keeping a light shirt on and leaving the genitals exposed.

This makes the moment more sensual, as you don’t need to be totally naked.

For women, the erotic touch is more stimulating than the pornographic one, so create this sex appeal within yourself.

It is suggested that you wear lingerie that makes you feel even more beautiful and sexy.

3) Women have a tendency to masturbate in the bedroom or in the bathroom

Regardless of the location, the important thing is that you feel comfortable and safe to do it.

If it is in the bedroom, the suggestion is that you avoid lying down completely.

When you lie down completely, you stimulate the senses to disconnect, to be less attentive, and this also prevents your pleasure from reaching its greatest potential.

Stay at a half-lying, half-sitting angle, as if you were at a 45-degree angle.

If you do it in the bathroom, try to avoid water on the vagina, because water tends to eliminate its natural lubrication, making the act of masturbation very difficult.

4) Women tend to contract their legs when they masturbate 

This is quite common.

When women masturbate they tend to contract some muscles, including the butt, the thighs, and sometimes the abdomen.

The important thing is to leave most of the muscles relaxed and loosened up wherever you are.

Relax in bed, on the sofa, on the carpet, or wherever you prefer.

An interesting idea is for you to position yourself at 45 degrees, half-lying/half-sitting, on your back, with your legs slightly open as if they were in a position of butterfly wings, and allowing yourself to relax.

This position allows the entire area to be freely touched.

Open up, relax, let go – this will help in vascularization and therefore more blood will go to your genitals, making you more easily aroused.

Read also: 7 reasons why missionary position is the way to go

5) Women also think that masturbation is focused on the genitals 

Don’t just focus on the genital, your body needs to feel that you are more than that.

Touch your body beyond the vagina. Never start directly on the vagina or the clitoris.

Touch different parts of the body, caressing your arms, neck, legs, butt, until you reach the vagina.

When you reach the vagina, touch it without the obligation to get aroused, but try to touch yourself exactly as you want, touching the outer labia, inner labia, the vagina, and the clitoris the way you like the most.

6) Women masturbate using the hand that is mostly used in their everyday life

Using the most skilled hand is not a problem, it is an advantage.

Using the hand that is mostly used on a daily basis, the hand of your preference and which probably has the lightest and most skillful movements, is actually recommended.

But if you can, at some point, switch hands! Using your other hand can bring a different feeling that is worth experiencing.

7) Women know that the clitoris is the most sensitive part of the body

It is common for women to know that the clitoris is the most sensitive part in their body, but stimulating the entire length of the genital organ is important.

When you touch the vulva, start at the bottom of the vagina and bring your hand up until you get close to the clitoris – this is one way.

The other way is to move your hand in circles, stimulating all areas at the same time, without focusing only on the entrance of the vagina.

With the lubrication that will possibly start to come, it becomes even more enjoyable to move your hand in circles as mentioned.

Take advantage of the lubrication and slide your hand over several areas.

8) Women don’t always remember that a lubricating gel can be pleasurable

Lubricating gels exist to facilitate stimulation and even penetration.

In the case of masturbation, if your vagina is a little dry, try adding a water-based lubricating gel.

This facilitates the sliding motion of the hand, the contact and the pleasant touch when placing something that makes the genital organ as wet and lubricated as the gel does.

Always use water-based lubricating gels, beware of those that are not water-based. You can read more about this on the label of the product.

Let your hand slide over you with gel.

9) When masturbating, women tend to want to go all the way without stopping 

Like men, most women masturbate with the aim of reaching orgasm.

Remember that pleasure becomes more intense if you enjoy all the stimulation that builds up until you reach an orgasm.

So, do not stimulate the clitoris without stopping as if you were looking for an orgasm.

Take light breaks for a few seconds, because it is sometimes in these pauses that the clitoris signals the perception of pleasure.

Everything becomes more intense this way.

Orgasm is a consequence of high stimulation. Just worry about increasing the arousal. If you get to a high point of arousal, orgasm will naturally come.

10) Women have a tendency to want to move their hips

The hip is fully connected to the female orgasm. It is common for women to move their hips when they are close to climax.

If this urge appears, do not hold it. Let your hips loose.

As soon as the arousal increases, move your body along to the stimulation as if you were in sexual intercourse.

At this moment, touch the areas you like best on your genital organ, the way you like it, and move your hips along the way you prefer.

Light movements of the hips are usually pleasant for women whenever arousal increases.

11) Women forget to breathe when they masturbate

Oxygen is the biggest fuel for great arousal.

Failure to properly oxygenate your body will always prevent arousal from going as high as it could go. Don’t forget to oxygenate, that is, to breathe.

Masturbating and letting oxygen in, keeping the body oxygenated, is one of the doors to the most intense pleasure.

Women often make their bodies tenser when they masturbate and breathe very little.

So, when masturbating, let oxygen into your lungs.

How a man masturbates

Men often masturbate while watching porn

1) Men often masturbate while watching porn

Watching porn and opening images and videos on their cell phone, tablet or computer are very common practices for men when they masturbate.

If you masturbate and always associate porn with that moment, start avoiding it a little.

I have seen several men at the clinic who masturbate while watching porn, and they present a tendency to ejaculate faster as time goes by, as well as a decrease in sexual desire and a difficulty to fantasize, or to be aroused, without the presence of these films.

What is now a gain in stimulus may not be so afterwards.

2) Men tend to masturbate quickly

Men tend to masturbate quickly

Masturbating quickly is common for men.

The tendency is to try to shorten the time until ejaculation by accelerating the speed of masturbation.

Don’t masturbate quickly as to speed up arousal.

Premature ejaculation, in the vast majority of times, is related to the speed of masturbation that ends up educating the body on how to ejaculate quickly. If you do this many times, this is how your body will work afterwards: fast.

See also: How to Last Longer in Bed

People who masturbate quickly tend to also ejaculate quickly during sex.

3) Men don’t often choose the place where they will masturbate

Men have their favorite places to masturbate in, such as the bathroom, shower, bedroom, or living room, but they are not very demanding about it.

Some even seek inappropriate places as long as they satisfy their desires.

When masturbating, prefer places where you will not be interrupted.

Knowing that you can be interrupted at any time does not contribute to pleasurable masturbation.

Masturbating and being worried that someone will arrive will only increase the release of adrenaline, a substance which, when triggered in your body, will change the speed of ejaculation, usually accelerating it.

4) When men start to masturbate, they tend to go all the way to climax without stopping

Beginning to masturbate with the aim of reaching an orgasm is the practice of many who masturbate.

It is always recommended to take breaks, avoiding reaching an orgasm.

Example: Work on becoming aroused and then relaxing, repeating this process until you are highly aroused.

Provoking arousal up to the point where you think you will be close to climax and then reducing stimulation, and then repeating this 3 or 4 times, is usually a super interesting practice.

This makes you feel the orgasm even more deeply.

So don’t try to arouse yourself up to the point where you already climax in the first time.

Resist 3 or 4 stimulations like this, with pauses and restarts, and you will notice the difference in the intensity of pleasure and in the orgasm reached at the end.

Everything will get more intense.

5) Men don’t always use gel

Men tend to opt for dry masturbation, with a dry hand, although sometimes water is used.

The dry hand can be a quiet way, but using gel is an option, even for training to control the moment of ejaculation.

If you are going to use gel, check if you like it and, if you do, check if it doesn’t arouse you too quickly, because the gel can resemble the lubrication of the vagina.

When you are already masturbating you can put lubricating gel on your penis, between your hand and the penis.

You can use gel whenever you want. But, as it is intended to imitate the lubrication of the vagina, this can be an intense stimulus for you.

If the pleasure you feel is intense, you can still keep the gel but slow your hand movements when stimulating the penis.

6) Men tend to always masturbate with the same hand

Using the hand of greater skill is a common scene.

If you always masturbate with your right hand, use your left hand every now and then.

A good experience to try from time to time (but not always) is to change the hand with which you masturbate.

If you masturbate with the right hand, try the left one; if you use the left hand, try the right one.

7) Men tend to place their hand and focus the stimulus on the glans

Touching, pressing, and lightly squeezing the glans can be some exciting ways to masturbate, but don’t focus only on the head of the penis.

Go up and down the entire organ, from the base to the glans, holding, pressing, or stimulating it in any way you prefer.

Enjoy. The penis is much more than just the glans.

8) Men tend to fantasize very little

Usually, when men are masturbating, they think of a sex scene in a given sexual position, often fantasizing about penetration and intercourse that is already happening.

The tendency is to start masturbating while already thinking about the end of a sexual relation.

Fantasize, imagine, create beautiful images in your head, bring the thoughts that you feel like bringing, but, when thinking about the scene that excites you, try to think more about the details rather than one single objective.

For example:

When fantasizing, don’t just think about penetration or something related to it, try to imagine the details of the body of the person who is with you, like their hair, their back, the details of their hands, where this person is, props they have on their body, the environment in which your fantasy is happening or whatever else you would like to imagine.

Remember to masturbate slowly and to imagine more details than just to focus on intercourse.

9) Men breathe less than they should during masturbation

When masturbating, men tend to tighten up, breathing less than what they could be breathing.

By reading this here, it is likely that you have started to pay attention to your own breathing.

If you noticed that your breathing was shallow now, it is likely that you will also tend to limit oxygen during masturbation.

So breathe!

Men forget to breathe and this only encourages them to climax fast. Breathe so that the relaxation and pleasure will come in greater intensity.

10) Men seek the instant of ejaculation

This one is practically unanimous: men think that if there is no orgasm, then the moment was not good enough.

Men often aim to ejaculate; they masturbate so they can ejaculate.

I would like to invite you to do it differently, so that you do not only seek the end of the path.

I invite you to enjoy the whole way building up to it, instead of just looking for the climax.

The tastier the path, the tastier the ending will be.

The more you enjoy the moments that come before, the greater the intensity of pleasure in the end.

Difference between men and women (in masturbation)

Difference between men and women (in masturbation)

1) Men don’t care so much about the setting; women frequently pay more attention to this

In both masturbation and sex, women tend to observe and value the setting more than men.

Creating an enjoyable atmosphere, decorating the room with stimulating colors, candles, or even preparing the bed with different sheets so as to make it look like a movie scene… these are things that women value a lot.

Taking care of the smell and temperature of the place are other points taken into much more consideration by women than by men.

It is usually women who pay the most attention to this.

And if we refer to the atmosphere outside the room, the same trend is likely to occur.

Women are much more careful in checking if someone is watching, if they are in a safe place, and if no one will come and interrupt.

In sex, if a man wants to surprise a woman, it is important to pay attention to the place he is going to take her, trying to understand what she likes and taking care of it in detail.

When it comes to masturbation, men often take little care of the place they are in.

Women look for a more suitable place, as mentioned above, so they will not be interrupted.

They take as much care to the place in which they will be having sex as to the place in which they will be masturbating.

2) Men often take advantage of the time in the shower or any other place to masturbate, while women wait for the ideal moment to do it

men usually masturbate in the shower

When in the shower, it is quite common for men to touch their penis.

They often do this and take advantage of the water and the shower to generate some stimulus in their organ.

Women do not always enjoy masturbating in the shower.

Some of them actually dislike it because the water in the shower takes away some of the vagina’s natural lubrication, so it makes the vagina less arousable.

Women prefer to stimulate themselves outside the shower rather than in it.

In the moments that are destined for masturbation, men are less demanding.

Women tend to schedule the moment when they will masturbate, thinking for example in how many minutes it will happen, if it will happen that night, or when they get to the room, etc.

Men tend to see if the moment is right and seize it right away.

3) If a woman is not feeling good about her body, she avoids masturbating. A man does not care so much about his body when he wants to masturbate.

Women suffer greater beauty demands, so they demand more from their bodies than men.

If women are not happy with their appearance, they do not feel encouraged to masturbate; they might even avoid doing it.

Because men worry less about physical beauty features, they will masturbate in spite of having gained two pounds or not, for example.

When wishing to masturbate, the last thing men will do is to be hard on themselves about their looks the way that women are.

4) Women are beginning to use more sex toys than men during masturbation

The sex industry has created countless toys and stimulators for men and women, intended to be used during sex and masturbation.

Women are, however, still the biggest consumers of sex toys when they masturbate, while men tend to use less products.

From creams, gels, stimulators and silicone objects all the way to cyberskin (a material found in sex shops that is very similar to human skin and that covers objects), sex products are much more consumed by women in the moment of masturbation.

Men have not yet developed the habit of using sex toys to masturbate.

5) Men use their hands practically 100% of the time to stimulate the penis. Women use their hands, but also other lighter objects.

A handkerchief, a feather or even a piece of underwear that are smoothly glided over the vagina, the outer labia and even over the clitoris can be stimulating to a woman.

Since the sensitivity, especially of the clitoris, is quite high, the woman has more options in addition to just using her hand, because for women the clitoris perceives stimuli very easily.

Men, on the other hand, report that it is with their hand that they know how to touch, how to stimulate, how to speed up the movement or decrease the speed of the stimulus.

That is why men still use their own hands almost 100% of the time.

6) Men often associate porn to the moment of masturbation, women hardly ever do it

Pornographic films are much more used by men than by women, especially because the way the film is produced and edited, as well as the camera position and everything else about the film, are done with the aim of stimulating men.

During masturbation, it is very common for men to watch porn, access Whatsapp or pornographic websites.

For women, on the other hand, porn is not always associated to masturbation.

7) Both men and women increase arousal if they use their ability to imagine and fantasize. Women use it more than men, however, when they are going to masturbate.

Both men and women use sexual fantasies

Both men and women use sexual fantasies, that is, thoughts, memories, images, sounds of people and moments that are arousing to them.

When used, fantasies enhance not only pleasure but the experience of masturbation itself.

It is more common, however, to see women, rather than men, getting aroused through sexual fantasies.

Read also: 3 Tips to turn a girl on

While men tend to take the ready-made image coming from a screen, women do not always do this.

When they associate stimuli to masturbation, it is through creating something within their own imagination.

I encourage both women to see ready-made images and men to use their imagination.

The ideal is to find a balance between seeing something from the outside and imagining something on the inside.

How to give a man a good hand-job

If you want to give a man a good hand-job, keep these in mind: 

1) For him, the penis is probably the most important part of the body

Even if you create stimuli all throughout a man’s body, he will still expect you to touch the penis, as if the penis was the peak of stimulation.

So remember, somehow you will have to get to this area, where he knows he will have a good experience.

When women give men a hand-job, they do what they would like to have done to them, sometimes not touching the penis right away.

Remember though that men do not really appreciate it when they are being touched around the penis but not directly on it.

That is how men interpret the situation.

Do not touch him in different areas of the body as you would like him to do if he was masturbating you.

You will have to get to the penis, otherwise he won’t really enjoy the experience.

2) If you are going to give a man a hand-job, show that you desire him, that you want more than just touching him

Show that you desire him

Do not give a man a hand-job just for the sake of it, because you think it will give him pleasure.

Give a man a hand-job when you’re in the mood, and let him know you feel this way.

For example, touching him with desire, looking at the penis as if you really desire it. This will make him feel even more pleasure.

It is not always recommended to look at a man in the eye when you are giving him a hand-job, as some men may feel intimidated if you do this.

It is different when you are performing oral sex though, because you will look him in the eye and he will probably be aroused by it.

We will talk about oral sex techniques at another time.

So express desire for the penis. This will make most men very pleased with what you are doing.

3) Give attention to the entire penis, don’t just stay on the glans

Avoid touching the glans only. Of course, the head is the most sensitive part of the penis, but the whole genital can and should be stimulated, because the whole penis is sensitive.

4) If you like to touch his testicles, be careful because the area is also sensitive to pain

Unless he likes it, avoid stimulating the testicles too much. This area is absolutely sensitive to touch and also to pain.

Touching the testicles can therefore make the moment actually unpleasant.

Don’t squeeze them, don’t hit them, don’t try to stimulate the area too much.

Light and soft touches without too much pressure are suggested.

If you use your mouth, do it in the same way, with light stimulation in the testicle area.

5) Alternate movements but don’t practice acrobatics on the penis

The classic back-and-forth movement is already quite pleasing to men.

Moving the skin of the penis in the traditional way of masturbation already causes great stimulation.

The most important is to increase the speed as soon as men begin to express the desire to orgasm.

You don’t need to overdo it on the speed, just increase it a little. His will to orgasm will grow with this.

6) Play with him, tease him

When he is about to climax, stop. Start and stop as much as you can. Up to 3 or 4 times, then you can go all the way.

In the meantime, practice stimulating and pausing in this way if you can: stimulate the penis as if you wanted to make it come, but when it starts to be highly aroused, you reduce the movement a little.

Go on mixing intensity and pauses. This will intensify the man’s arousal while you stimulate him, and will also provoke him to a great degree.

Avoid starting and going all the way to the end without stopping.

7) Once he reaches an orgasm, remove your hand as soon as possible

The penis becomes sensitive so it is not a great idea to touch it after the orgasm, at least until the penis recovers.

Men do not like to be touched on the penis after the ejaculation, especially because this creates discomfort, and in some cases even pain.

Once he climaxes, remove your hand as soon as possible.

If the man has had an orgasm, then the experience was good for him. He doesn’t have to continue. At this point he needs to rest.

Don’t mind him if he falls asleep, as this is also normal after an ejaculation has occurred.

How to give a woman a good hand-job

If you want to give a woman a good hand-job, keep these in mind:

1) The vagina should not be your only focus

To stimulate a woman, you should first touch her elsewhere.

Men expect direct touches, but women prefer it differently. When touching a woman, do not go with the single intention of reaching the vagina.

Touch the woman in other parts of the body first. Once when she is already aroused, you should proceed to the vagina.

Women have sensitive areas all over their body, the vagina is just one of them.

2) Do not take her panties off so you can touch her

If everyone takes off the woman’s panties to masturbate her, do it differently.

Touch her while keeping her panties on and placing only your hand and fingers under it.

This is a different form of stimulation which most women certainly do not experience during masturbation.

3) Touch the groin, outer labia, inner labia, all without touching the clitoris

Start by only approaching the clitoris, do not be in a rush to touch it right away. Avoid touching the clitoris before the woman is lubricated.

The groin, outer labia, inner labia and clitoris are all areas of great sensitivity, but the clitoris should be the last one to be touched.

4) You should reach the clitoris only when she becomes lubricated

When the woman becomes lubricated, the lubrication itself ends up stimulating the ones who touch and the ones who are being touched.

So if you are going to touch a woman, let your hand become lubricated first, notice the warmth around the vagina, and then reach the clitoris.

Any touch made this way stops being invasive and becomes pleasant.

It is as if you are going to touch the woman and stimulate her with her already asking for it.

Everything is easier if she is already lubricated.

5) It might be a good idea to use a lubricating gel

The use of lubricating gel may be a good suggestion.

Make sure to always know which gel you are buying and where you are buying it, so you are purchasing high-quality water-based gels, which are the healthiest ones.

Pour the gel on your hand and let it warm up on your own hand first. As soon as it starts to melt, you can begin to stimulate the woman.

If the gel is still cold, the woman’s first reaction will be to contract her body. Let it warm up and she will want to feel the warm gel.

Touch, slide, make circles with your hands… find out how you like to do it and how the woman you’re with likes to be touched.

The gel is to be used whenever you feel like it.

6) Do not touch the clitoris with too much pressure

Do not touch the clitoris with too much pressure

Do not touch it agressively and do not keep your fingers stiff. Let your fingers touch the woman in a pleasing way.

A firm hand that is not heavy, or a hand that shows confidence but does not have an aggressive style are the most suitable.

For the clitoris there is no point in having movements with a lot of pressure – it is sensitive and will notice your hand even when you touch it superficially.

So tap the clitoris in circles, always touching around it, not directly over it.

It is only after the woman is aroused enough that the touch on the clitoris becomes enjoyable.

7) Circular movements are pleasant to women

Each woman has a particular way to stimulate herself, each woman has the way she likes to masturbate and to be masturbated.

But there is a movement that affects most women and that is pleasing to almost all of them: movements in circles.

Example: Imagine the following scene: you put ink on a sheet of paper and use your two or three larger fingers to make circular movements until that ink is spread all over the paper.

Make sure that you do not force to spread the paint, as this is the way you should stimulate the woman, without force and using circular movements.

8) Don’t keep trying to just put your finger inside the vagina

Some people think that placing a finger inside the vagina (fingering), especially when the woman is not stimulated, will lead to a feeling of enormous pleasure.

This may happen eventually, but when it does it is only after the woman has already been stimulated.

It is not recommended to just put your finger inside the vagina to make it feel any random sensation.

For many women, the act of frequently putting your finger inside the vagina can even cause disgust.

If you are going to finger her, stay in the entrance of the vagina and be careful.

Move forward only after realizing that the woman herself is making room for this.

9) Do not keep staring at the vagina

Looking at a woman can be arousing to her as long as you are admiring her entirely.

Women don’t like it if you keep staring at her vagina all the time. Look at her whole body, and also at the vagina of course.

But don’t just focus on the vagina as this is in no way arousing for most women.

10) Let her orgasm on her own pace, don’t try to rush her

You can give the best possible stimuli, but the person who shall decide whether or not to reach orgasm is the woman herself.

You can stimulate her entire body, create pleasures that she has never experienced, including touching her in the best way that anyone could have ever touched, but the person who decides whether or not to climax is the woman herself.

Know that you can touch her but don’t rush her to orgasms, let her decide for herself.

Give the best stimulus you can give, do what gives you the most pleasure and what arouses her the most, but let every woman get where she wants in her own pace.

This in itself is already stimulating to women, leaving them free to choose the pleasure they want to have.

Sources:

Marlon Mattedi

Is a Psychologist and Sexual Therapist with Postgraduate degree in Sexual Therapy from the Brazilian Institute of Sexology and Psychosomatic Medicine of São Paulo (ISEXP / SP) and by the Faculty of Medicine of ABC-São Paulo / SP. He is also a Specialist in Sexuality by the Brazilian Society of Studies in Human Sexuality (SBRASH); a Specialist in Sexual Counseling and Couple's Therapy by the SEXPOL Foundation of Madrid-Spain - Institute linked to the European Society (FES) and the World Association for Sexual Health (WAS). He was Secretary General of the Brazilian Society of Studies in Human Sexuality (SBRASH) from 2016 to 2017 and co-founded the site Sexosemduvida.com.


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